Skip to main content

Advertisement

Log in

‘Youth’s Conflict Resolution Strategies in their Dating Relationships’

  • Empirical Research
  • Published:
Journal of Youth and Adolescence Aims and scope Submit manuscript

Abstract

Youth can experience conflicts with their dating partner and then need strategies to solve such conflicts. Research is scarce regarding positive conflict resolution strategies in a dating context. Considering research on various interpersonal relationships (e.g. friendships, dating, marriage), the present study examined how dimensions of empathy, verbal skills and impulsivity can contribute to the use of positive conflict resolution strategies in dating relationships. The sample is made up of 813 youth attending secondary schools or a regional college (71.7% female, mean age = 18.9, age range 14.2–24.9). They completed self-administered questionnaires investigating positive conflict resolution strategies, as well as dimensions of empathy (i.e., fantasy, perspective-taking, empathic concern, and personal distress), verbal skills (similarities and figurative language) and impulsivity (positive urgency, negative urgency, lack of premeditation, lack of perseverance, and sensation seeking). The results reveal sex differences and developmental improvements on several factors. The findings showed that specific dimensions of empathy and verbal skills foster the use of positive conflict resolution strategies whereas specific dimensions of impulsivity and one dimension of empathy hamper it. Both sexes shared a common correlate: the propensity toward perspective-taking fostered the use of positive conflict resolution strategies. In addition to highlighting correlates of positive conflict resolution strategies in dating relationships, this study can contribute to programs dedicated to the promotion of healthy dating relationships among adolescents and emerging adults.

This is a preview of subscription content, log in via an institution to check access.

Access this article

Price excludes VAT (USA)
Tax calculation will be finalised during checkout.

Instant access to the full article PDF.

Similar content being viewed by others

References

  • Alderson-Day, B., & Fernyhough, C. (2015). Inner speech: development, cognitive functions, phenomenology, and neurobiology. Psychological Bulletin, 141, 931–965. https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000021.

    Article  PubMed  PubMed Central  Google Scholar 

  • Alexander, K. L. (2000). Prosocial Behaviors of Adolescents in work and family life: empathy and conflict resolution strategies with parents and peers. Presented in partial fulfillment of the requirements for PhD in the graduate school of The Ohio State University. ProQuest Dissertation.

  • Antônio, T., & Hokoda, A. (2009). Gender variations in dating violence and positive conflict resolution among Mexican adolescents. Violence and Victims, 24, 533–545. https://doi.org/10.1891/0886-6708.24.4.533.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Arriaga, X. B., & Rusbult, C. E. (1998). Standing in my partner’s shoes: partner perspective taking and reactions to accommodative dilemmas. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 24, 927–948. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167298249002.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Bates, C. E., & Samp, J. A. (2011). Examining the effects of planning and empathic accuracy on communication in relational and nonrelational conflict interactions. Communication Studies, 62, 207–223. https://doi.org/10.1080/10510974.2010.517597.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Berger, L, McMakin, D., & Furman, W. (2005). The language of love: romantic relationships in adolescence. In A. Williams, C. Thurlow (eds.), Talking Adolescence: Perspectives on Communication in the Teenage Years. (pp. 129–145). New York, NY: Peter Lang Publishing.

  • Billieux, J., Rochat, L., Ceschi, G., Carré, A., Offerlin-Meyer, I., Defeldre, A. C., Khazaal, Y., Besche-Richard, C., & Van der Linden, M. (2012). Validation of a short French version of the UPPS-P impulsive behavior scale. Comprehensive Psychiatry, 53, 609–615. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.comppsych.2011.09.001.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Bonache, H., Gonzalez-Mendez, R., & Krahé, B. (2017). Romantic attachment, conflict resolution styles, and teen dating violence victimization. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 46, 1905–1917. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10964-017-0635-2.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Bonache, H., Ramírez-Santana, G., & Gonzalez-Mendez, R. (2016). Conflict resolution styles and teen dating violence. International Journal of Clinical and Health Psychology, 16, 276–286. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ijchp.2016.03.003.

    Article  PubMed  PubMed Central  Google Scholar 

  • Boutard, C., Guillon, A. & Charlois, A. L. (2010). Protocole d’Evaluation du Langage Elaboré de l’Adolescent. Ortho Edition, Isbergues (France).

  • Camarena, P. M., Sarigiani, P. A., & Peterson, A. C. (1990). Gender-specific pathways to intimacy in early adolescence. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 19, 19–32. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF01539442.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Caughlin, J. P., & Vangelisti, A. L. (2006). Conflict in dating and marital relationships. In J. G. Oetzel & S. Ting-Toomey (Eds.), The SAGE Handbook of Conflict Communication: Integrating Theory, Research, and Practice (pp. 129–158). Thousand Oaks, CA: SAGE. http://dx.doi.org/10.4135/9781412976176.n5.

  • Cocco, R., & Ervas, F. (2012). Gender stereotypes and figurative language comprehension. Humana Mente Journal of Philosophical Studies, 22, 43–55.

    Google Scholar 

  • Collins, W. A., Welsh, D. P., & Furman, W. (2009). Adolescent romantic relationships. Annual Review of Psy, 60, 631–652. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev.psych.60.110707.163459.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Connolly, J., Baird, K., Bravo, V., Lovald, B., Pepler, D., & Craig, W. (2015). Adolescents’ use of affiliative and aggressive strategies during conflict with romantic partners and best-friends. European Journal of Developmental Psychology, 12, 549–564. https://doi.org/10.1080/17405629.2015.1066244.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Courtain, A., & Glowacz, F. (2018). Exploration of dating violence and related attitudes among adolescents and emerging adults. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, First published 18 April 2018. https://doi.org/10.1177/0886260518770185.

  • Cramer, D. (2000). Relationship satisfaction and conflict style in romantic relationships. The Journal of Psychology, 134, 337–341. https://doi.org/10.1080/00223980009600873.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Cross, C. P., Copping, L. T., & Campbell, A. (2011). Sex differences in impulsivity: a meta-analysis. Psychological Bulletin, 137, 97–130. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0021591.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Davidson, J., & Wood, C. (2004). A conflict resolution model. Theory into Practice, 43, 6–13. https://doi.org/10.1207/s15430421tip4301_2.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Davis, M. H. (1980). A multidimensional approach to individual differences in empathy. JSAS Catalog of Selected Documents in Psychology, 10, 85.

    Google Scholar 

  • Davis, M. H. (1983). Measuring individual differences in empathy: evidence for a multidimensional approach. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 44, 113–126. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.44.1.113.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • De La Rue, L., Polanin, J. R., Espelage, D. L., & Piggot, T. D. (2014). School-based interventions to reduce dating and sexual violence: a systematic review. Campbell Systematic Reviews, 7. https://doi.org/10.4073/csr.2014.7.

  • De Wied, M., Branje, S. J. T., & Meeus, W. H. J. (2007). Empathy and conflict resolution in friendship relations among adolescents. Aggressive Behavior, 33, 48–55. https://doi.org/10.1002/ab.20166.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Dumontheil, I., Apperly, I. A., & Blakemore, S. J. (2010). Online usage of theory of mind continues to develop in late adolescence. Developmental Science, 13, 331–338. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-7687.2009.00888.x.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Eisenberg, N., Fabes, R. A., Murphy, B., Karbon, M., Maszk, P., Smith, M., O’Boyle, C., & Suh, K. (1994). The relations of emotionality and regulation to dispositional and situational empathy-related responding. J Pers Soc Psychol, 66, 776–97. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.66.4.776.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Enticott, P. G., Ogloff, J. R. P., & Bradshaw, J. L. (2006). Associations between laboratory measures of executive inhibitory control and self-reported impulsivity. Personality and Individual Differences, 41, 285–294. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2006.01.011.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Feldman, S. S., & Gowen, L. C. (1998). Conflict negotiation tactics in romantic relationships in high school students. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 27, 691–706. https://doi.org/10.1023/A:1022857731497.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Feshbach, N. D., & Feshbach, S. (1982). Learning to care. San Francisco, California: Scott, Foresman & Co.

    Google Scholar 

  • Furman, W., & Wehner, E. A. (1994). In R. Montemayor, G. R. Adams, T. P. Gullota (eds.), Advances in Adolescent Development: Personal Relationships During Adolescence. (pp. 168–195). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.

  • Garaigordobil, M. (2012). Cooperative conflict-solving during adolescence: relationships with cognitive-behavioural and predictor variables. Infancia York Aprendizaje, 35, 151–165. https://doi.org/10.1174/021037012800217998.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Gilet, A. L., Mella, N., Studer, J., Grühn, D., & Labouvie-Vief, G. (2013). Assessing dispositional empathy in adults: a French validation of the Interpersonal Reactivity Index (IRI). Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science/Revue canadienne des Sciences Délután Comportement, 45, 42–48. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0030425.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Gillebaart, M., Schneider, I. K., & De Ridder, D. T. D. (2016). Effects of trait self-control on response conflict about healthy and unhealthy food. Journal of Personality, 84, 789–798. https://doi.org/10.1111/jopy.12219.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Glowacz, F., & Courtain, A. (2017). Violences au sein des relations amoureuses des adolescents et jeunesadultes: une réalité à ne pas négliger. Champ pénal/Penal field, XIV, 1–23. http://champpenal.revues.org/9582.

    Google Scholar 

  • Greenman, S. J., & Matsuda, M. (2016). From early dating violence to adult intimate partner violence: continuity and sources of resilience in adulthood. Crim Behav Ment Health, 26, 293–303. https://doi.org/10.1002/cbm.2012.

    Article  PubMed  PubMed Central  Google Scholar 

  • Ha, T., Overbeek, G., Lichtwarck-Aschoff, A., Rutger, C. M., & Engels, R. C. M. E. (2013). Do conflict resolution and recovery predict the survival of adolescents’ romantic relationships?. PLoS ONE, 8, e61871 https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0061871.

    Article  PubMed  PubMed Central  Google Scholar 

  • Harden, P. K., & Tucker-Drob, E. M. (2011). Individual differences in the development of sensation seeking and impulsivity during adolescence: further evidence for a dual systems model. Developmental Psychology, 47, 739–746. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0023279.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Hofmann, W., Luhmann, M., Fischer, R. R., Vohs, K. D., & Baumeister, R. F. (2014). Yes, but are they happy? Effects of trait self-control on affective well-being and life satisfaction. Journal of Personality, 82, 265–277. https://doi.org/10.1111/jopy.12050.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Hokoda, A., Martin Del Campo, M., & Ulloa, E. (2012). Age and gender differences in teen relationship violence. Journal of Aggression, Maltreatment & Trauma, 21, 351–364. https://doi.org/10.1080/10926771.2012.659799.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Holdnack, J. A., & Weiss, L. G. (2013). Demographic adjustments to WAIS-IV/WMS-IV norms. In J. A. Holdnack, L. Drozdick, L. G. Weiss, G. L. Iverson (eds.), WAIS-IV, WMS-IV, and ACS: advanced clinical interpretation. (pp. 171–216). San Diego, CA: Elsevier Science Publishing. 10.1016/B978-0-12-386934-0.00004-3.

  • Ireland, M. E., Slatcher, R. B., Eastwick, P. W., Scissors, L. E., Finkel, E. J., & Pennebaker, J. W. (2011). Language style matching predicts relationship initiation and stability. Psychological Science, 22, 39–44. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797610392928.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Jäger, A., Loschelder, D. D., & Friese, M. (2017). Using self-regulation to overcome the detrimental effects of anger in negotiations. Journal of Economic Psychology, 58, 31–43. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.joep.2016.09.003.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Jönsson, P., & Wohlin, C. (2004). An evaluation of k-nearest neighbour imputation using likert data. 10th international symposium on software metrics, Septembre11-17, Chicago, USA. https://doi.org/10.1109/METRIC.2004.1357895. June 15 in 2017 from http://www.wohlin.eu/metrics04.pdf.

  • Kilpatrick, S. D., Bissonnette, V. L., & Rusbult, C. E. (2002). Empathic accuracy and accommodative behavior among newly married couples. Personal Relationships, 9, 369–393. https://doi.org/10.1111/1475-6811.09402.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Kurdek, L. A. (1994). Conflict resolution styles in gay, lesbian, heterosexual nonparent, and heterosexual parent couples. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 56, 705–722. https://doi.org/10.2307/352880.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Lakoff, G. (1987). Women, Fire and Dangerous Things: What Categories Reveal About the Mind. Chicago, IL/London: University of Chicago Press.

    Book  Google Scholar 

  • Laursen, B., & Pursell, G. (2009). Conflict in peer relationships. In K. H. Rubin, W. M. Bukowski, B. Laursen (eds.) Handbook of peer interactions, relationships, and groups. (pp. 267–286). New York, NY: The Guilford Press.

  • Laursen, B., Finkelstein, B. D., & Betts, N. T. (2001). A developmental meta-analysis of peer conflict resolution. Developmental Review, 21, 423–449. https://doi.org/10.1006/drev.2000.0531.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Littlefield, L., Love, A., Peck, C., & Wertheim, E. H. (1993). A model for resolving conflict: some theoretical, empirical and practical implications. Australian Psychologist, 28, 80–85. https://doi.org/10.1080/00050069308258880.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Lynam, D. R., Smith, G. T., Whiteside, S. P., & Cyders, M. A. (2006). The UPPS-P: Assessing five personality pathways to impulsive behavior. Technical report. West Lafayette, IN: Purdue University.

  • Marigold, D. C., & Anderson, J. E. (2016). Shifting expectations of partners’ responsiveness changes outcomes of conflict discussions. Personal Relationships, 23, 517–535. https://doi.org/10.1111/pere.12141.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Meeks, B. S., Hendrick, S. S., & Hendrick, C. (1998). Communication, love, and relationship satisfaction. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 15, 755–773. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407598156003.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Mestre, M. V., Samper, P., Frías, M. D., & Tur, A. M. (2009). Are women more empathetic than men? A longitudinal study in adolescence. Span J Psychol, 12, 76–83. https://doi.org/10.1017/S1138741600001499.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Mischel, W, DeSmet, A. L., & Kross, E. (2014). Self-Regulation in the Service of Conflict Resolution. In P. T. Coleman, M. Deutsch, E. C. Marcus (eds.) The handbook of conflict resolution: Theory and practice. (pp. 294–313). San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

  • Nippold, M. A (2006). Language development in school-age children, adolescents, and adults. In K. Brown (ed.) Encyclopedia of language and linguistics. (2nd ed.) pp. 368–372. Oxford, UK: Elsevier Publishing.

  • Nippold, M. A. (2016). Later Language Development: School-age children, adolescents, and young adults. (4th ed.) Austin, TX: Pro-Ed.

    Google Scholar 

  • Paradis, A., Hébert, M., & Fernet, M. (2017). Dyadic dynamics in young couples reporting dating violence an actor–partner interdependence model. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 32, 130–148. https://doi.org/10.1177/0886260515585536.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Pedersen, P., & Thomas, C. D. (1992). Prevalence and correlates of dating violence in a Canadian University sample. Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science, 24, 490–501. https://doi.org/10.1037/h0078756.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Raffaelli, M., & Duckett, E. (1989). “We were just talking”: conversations in early adolescence. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 18, 567–582. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF02139074.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Roloff, M. E., & Ifert, D. E. (2000). Conflict management through avoidance: Withholding complaints, suppressing arguments, and declaring topics taboo. In S. Petronio (ed.) Balancing the secrets of private disclosures. (pp. 151–163). Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.

  • Rusbult, C. E., Verette, J., Whitney, G. A., Slovik, L. F., & Lipkus, I. (1991). Accommodation processes in close relationships: theory and preliminary empirical evidence. J Pers Soc Psychol, 60, 53–78. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.60.1.53.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Sapir, E (1924). The grammarian and his language. In D. G. Mandebaum (ed.) The Selected Writings of E. Sapir on Language, Culture and Personality. (pp. 150–159). Berkley, CA: University of California Press.

  • Schulman, S., & Connolly, J. (2013). The challenge of romantic relationship in emerging adulthood: reconceptualization of the field. Emerging Adulthood, 1, 27–39. https://doi.org/10.1177/2167696812467330.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Schulman, S., & Scharf, M. (2000). Adolescent romantic behaviors and perceptions: age- and gender-related differences, and links with family and peer relationships. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 10, 99–118. https://doi.org/10.1207/SJRA1001_5.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Schulman, S., Tuval-Mashiach, R., Levran, E., & Anbar, S. (2006). Conflict resolution patterns and longevity of adolescent romantic couples: a 2-year follow-up study. Journal of Adolescence, 29, 575–588. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.adolescence.2005.08.018.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Selman, R. L. (1980). The growth of interpersonal understanding: Developmental and clinical analyses. New York, NY: Academic Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Smith-Darden, J. P., Kernsmith, P. D., Reidy, D. E., & Cortina, K. S. (2016). In search of modifiable risk and protective factors for teen dating violence. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 27, 423–435. https://doi.org/10.1111/jora.12280.

    Article  PubMed  PubMed Central  Google Scholar 

  • Steinberg, L. (2007). Risk taking in adolescence: new perspectives from brain and behavioural science. Psychological Science, 16, 55–59. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8721.2007.00475.x.

    Google Scholar 

  • Steinberg, L., Albert, D., Cauffman, E., Banich, M., Graham, S., & Woolard, J. (2008). Age differences in sensation seeking and impulsivity as indexed by behavior and self-report: evidence for a dual systems model. Dev Psychol, 44, 1764–78. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0012955.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Stillman, P. E., Medvedev, D., & Ferguson, M. J. (2017). Resisting temptation: tracking how self-control conflicts are successfully resolved in real time. Psychological Science, 28, 1240–1258. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797617705386.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Van Doorn, M. D., Branje, S. J. T., & Meeus, W. H. J. (2008). Conflict resolution in parent-adolescent relationships and adolescent delinquency. Journal of Early Adolescence, 28, 503–527. https://doi.org/10.1177/0272431608317608.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Visser, M., Das-Smaal, E., & Kwakman, H. (1996). Impulsivity and negative priming: evidence for diminished cognitive inhibition in impulsive children. British Journal of Psychology, 87, 131–140. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.2044-8295.1996.tb02580.x.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Vygotski, L. (1934). Pensée et langage. (4th ed.) Broché: La Dispute. 2013.

    Google Scholar 

  • Wadman, R., Durkin, K., & Conti-Ramsden, G. (2011). Close relationships in adolescents with and without a history of specific language impairment. Language, Speech, And Hearing Services In Schools, 42, 41–51. https://doi.org/10.1044/0161-1461(2010/10-0003).

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Wagner, D. D., & Heatherton, T. F. (2015). Self-regulation and its failure: Seven deadly threats to self-regulation. In M. Mikulincer, P. R. Shaver, E. Borgida & J. Bargh (Eds.), APA handbook of personality and social psychology. Attitudes and Social Cognition (pp. 805–842). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.

  • Whorf, B. (1956). Language, Thought, and Reality: Selected Writings of Benjamin Lee Whorf. Cambridge, MA: MIT Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Winstok, Z. (2008). Conflict escalation to violence and escalation of violent conflicts. Children and Youth Services Review, 30, 297–310. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.childyouth.2007.10.007.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Wittgenstein, L. (1922). Tractatus logico-philosophicus. London: Routledge & Kegan Paul.

    Google Scholar 

  • Wolfe, D. A., Scott, K., Reitzel-Jaffe, D., Wekerle, C., Grasley, C., & Straatman, A. L. (2001). Development and validation of the conflict in adolescent dating relationships inventory. Psychological Assessment, 13, 277–293. https://doi.org/10.1037/1040-3590.13.2.277.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Wood, J. T. (2011). Gendered Lives:Communication, Gender, and Culture. Boston, MA: Wadsworth Cenage Learning.

    Google Scholar 

  • Zimmer-Gembeck, M. J., Hughes, N., Kelly, M., & Connolly, J. (2012). Intimacy, identity and status: measuring dating goals in late adolescence and emerging adulthood. Motiv Emot, 36, 311–322. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11031-011-9253-6.

    Article  Google Scholar 

Download references

Acknowledgements

We are grateful to the youths who participated to our research as well as to schools that allowed the administration of questionnaires.

Authors’ Contributions

AC conceived of the study, collected the data, performed the statistical analysis and drafted the manuscript. FG conceived of the study, participated in the coordination of the study and assisted in editing on the manuscript. All authors read and approved the final manuscript.

Funding

Funding was provided by the F.R.S.-FNRS (Fund for Scientific Research) and the FRESH grant (Fonds de la Recherche en Sciences Humaines) awarded to Audrey Courtain.

Data Sharing and Declaration

This manuscript’s data will not be deposited.

Author information

Authors and Affiliations

Authors

Corresponding author

Correspondence to Audrey COURTAIN.

Ethics declarations

Conflict of Interest

The authors declare that they have no conflict of interest.

Ethical Approval

Our research was approved by the Université de Liège Review Board. The Research Ethics Board of our College endorses the European Charter for Researchers.

Informed Consent

Informed consent was obtained from all participants.

Rights and permissions

Reprints and permissions

About this article

Check for updates. Verify currency and authenticity via CrossMark

Cite this article

COURTAIN, A., GLOWACZ, F. ‘Youth’s Conflict Resolution Strategies in their Dating Relationships’. J Youth Adolescence 48, 256–268 (2019). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10964-018-0930-6

Download citation

  • Received:

  • Accepted:

  • Published:

  • Issue Date:

  • DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10964-018-0930-6

Keywords

Navigation